except it switched—faster than Superman at the speed of light—to small fights that were beyond childish. Can't blame you, what grown woman wants to feel as though she dating a two-year-old child in a grown man's body? It's irritating as hell. It's no secret that every couple has healthy disagreements on occasion. When a guy starts stupid fights with you, you do have the power to walk away and not contribute. I stayed 3 years and in the end i ended up being driven back to my hometown dropped off at a friends no jobs, car, no credit, and a duffle bag of clothes for my youngest and myself. Stephanie Bailey (author) from Denver on November 08, 2019: To all who have commented on this post, Thank You! His sister sticks her nose into something that she should not. I dated a guy for over 7 years and i didn't want a relationship when i met him. Until you love yourself enough to believe that you do deserve better, walking away from this type of unhealthy relationship can be challenging. He would always bail when times got hard and resurface when they were okay. It's almost as if he's trying to prove to himself that he is not worthy of being loved. They start arguments all the time because my mum knows when he starts on me for no reason and stands up for me! Since you don't know what it is that triggers these ridiculous fights, you will feel as though you are constantly on pins and needles around him, anxious that a fight may occur. Arguments have to have some reason, no matter how petty, behind them. I have helped him in major ways but he can go to new people he work with and immediately help them with a music project while I’m still left waiting. What is your relationship like after you "make-up"? A man, by nature, tends to look for comfort and consistency in his relationship. I paid him rent, i paid for all the eating out, entertainment , basically everything and i was okay with it because i was thankful for the opportunity to be able to work and provide for my family. More importantly, why are you with someone who you let (because it is our choice) treat you this way? I put him first even chose him over my oldest daughter thinking she would adapt and become comfortable . Cute things in the beginning have a way of becoming annoying the longer a relationship continues. What was confusing is I hadn't dated this guy long enough for any real or serious issues to come up that might be worth having "intense" discussions about. Find the motivating trigger within yourself that forces you to throw these personal attacks out as relationship issues out of yourself and on to him. Meanwhile he always ignored me if we argued and i stressed how much i didnt like it ecerytime but he still did it. I am the mother of 2 little kids and he keeps tryi g to throw me out and he keeps on saying be a mother when i work fulltime and a mother fulltime. My question is, "Why does it always have to be about the male and that he is the problem?". He starts with arguing why my aunt won't let him stay the night-well bc she doesn't know you enough and will thinkyou will still- it's not my fault. If it doesn't seem like any of the options above are viable, then maybe. It seems every little thing I do is wrong...He goes to work stays overnight comes home in the morning with CRAZY things.....He came home to a woman not questioning his whereabouts because I know he had work, cleaned up and was preparing for my day. I just talked to him a few minutes ago when I was tucked into bed, happy and relaxed after a good day's work. Have you ever been to counseling? Yikes! I have a few times started an argument over something that was petty and that I shouldn't have started an argument over, but I have never just started arguing with my husband for absolutely no reason at all. Some may even feel it makes them feel as though they've "been together for years" or it's a form of entertainment for their friends. 1 1. A guy like this definitely takes the fun out of bantering. Think about it. Communication sucks. When we stay in unhealthy relationship we are teaching not only our partners but also our children (if we have any) that the way we are being treating is OK. Love is not unkind. What he thought was entertaining by having these small fights was actually a turn-off and inappropriate behavior seen by others—including myself. If so, he is not choosing his battles wisely. This need to create drama through small arguments is also due to a lack of maturity. Every couple has a different way of communicating. What's also interesting—this guy is usually the first one to label someone as being "negative." Try again. Don't let things bottle up inside! But oftentimes, a solution is just within reach! But really it was always the dumbest of all things and if i mispronounced a word i couldnt even finish my sentense or story i was so shamefully corrected but this man claimed i was a inraged , psyhco, bat shit, mean , bitter, can never be happy person. And despite my hardship right now i hope when i am ready i meet someone who makes me feel good about myself and can experience conversation. Stephanie Bailey (author) from Denver on November 19, 2019: Most men lead with their heads in there pants—first, before their hearts. "When a guy starts stupid fights with you, you do have the power to walk away and not contribute.". All you can think about when you're with this guy is when he's going to start stomping his feet and throw himself on the ground in a tantrum. The idea of a family life was more appealing than my 5 year plan i was in school i wanted to gain my education start my career and buy a home that was aim. They grew up, generally, being dominated or abused. What attracted me to this guy—in the beginning—was his playful bantering. he could be narc.player.cheating.psycho.crazy.want attention. but i start stuff with him for NO REASON!-and i dont know why! All that damn time and id never had to pay someone so much rent as i gave him the months rent to leave my things until the first of the next month. Stephanie Bailey (author) from Denver on March 04, 2018: Ashley sprouse-holland, when someone starts fights for no significant reason that is due to their own insecurities. In the comments, as well as the article. It depends on why he does it and really only he would know why. Join the conversation! Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I think he studies me to know how to cause conflict in the relationship to validate his wrong. Most likely, he will be willing to talk about it with you or with a professional. Outburst are not fun to deal with and it is not your job to change or fix a man. i am not perfect but i am not the one always over praising myself and using mind manipulatiin to verify his story. He fought about what movie or TV program we watched. I worked all the time and never had time with my kids. If you are fearing that he will physically hurt you then you need to call your nearest domestic abuse hotline. Every time I get ready to go somewhere without him he picks and argument about something. Actions always speak louder then words....are you listening or ignoring and making excuses? www.askmen.com External Link December 18, 2003 12:18:47 AM from JoeUser Forums. I was out of goverment funding housing and independent again. Men like this are typically bad communicators, therefore they not only project their negative feelings onto you but also spew their verbal vomit through unnecessary drama. Ashley sprouse-holland on December 26, 2017: My husband likes to argue about everything. 180 180. The brilliance that he shared had to be in an argumentative form in order to express himself. it happens to everyone.. i getthat way too.. so i try to focus on something else are just leave a for a while to clear my head. I go over there to spend time with my son and he has a cow. Lv 7. You deserve a man who will love, cherish and honor you with respect, honesty and dignity--protecting your heart, not upsetting it. We argued for almost an hour; long bathroom lines, you think you're going to sit in lounge chairs, the bleachers are hard. Well according to him I'm stubborn, I don't listen, and on and on. He says I am always taking things to seriously but it's every day about anything. Are you taking medication? Frightening! I’ve been seeing this guy for 2months I really like him he was the one who stated communicating with me at first he said he just wanted to be friends but his actions said differently he was always calling me FaceTiming coming over to mine to spend time with me we have become intimate a threw times and everything flows and feels so natrual between us now recently his just been starting arguments with me making me upset then telling me how we could never be boyfriend and girlfriend and that he can’t see it working and giving me all excuses I feel so confused as I really like this guy and there a spark there his actions speak differently to his words his so affectionate with me I’m just so confused as I don’t know where I stand I want this to work as I can be myself around him but lately his just been starting arguments then after we make up and he starts again please someone help and give me some answers and advice what to do please. 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